Last week I had a build up of my EUPD (Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder) symptoms. Nothing I could really put my finger on but I could recognise some of the symptoms Very tired, falling asleep even during the day Headaches not clearing Wanting to stay in my safe place Acting impulsively, making plans and cancelling… Continue reading An “episode”
Tomorrow will be the last of my 7 weeks of group DBT, Dialectal Behavioural Therapy. Unfortunately I've been ill for 3 of them but have managed to catch up with help from my new nurse. During that time I have also been told my psychiatrist has left. So since Christmas I have lost my CPN… Continue reading My final DBT
Arrrrggggghhhh I could scream if it wouldn't involve waking up everyone in the house. It's almost 4am and I'm here, wide awake having not yet been to sleep. It's so frustrating being reliant on medication for everything and then forgetting. So this last two weeks I've been ill with a chest infection again. I've been… Continue reading Cant sleep won’t sleep
I have to remember on nights like today how far I’ve come. It’s hard because today I had a lot of things to do, a lot of places to be and lots of people to meet and I was overwhelmed from the moment I woke up. Instead of clearing my head, prioritising those things that… Continue reading Relapse of worry
I made it, I can't tell you yet that I enjoyed it or that I got anything out of it, but I did it. I came home actually feeling less positive and more helpless. I spent the whole group trying to answer questions in the right way, because it's a group. I don't want to… Continue reading Group therapy: week 1
In my support group last week, we talked about the attachment issues. As someone with borderline personality disorder I would acknowledge this has always been an issue, but it's only when you focus on it you can see the pattern. I do however have a massive issue with rejection, an irrational fear of losing people,… Continue reading I can’t believe I’m losing someone else
When we suffer from all kinds of mental health problems, it can change us, often into people we don't want to be. What I also need to say at this point is that right now I'm in a great place, so if you're reading it, please don't think I'm wandering down the dark staircase, it's… Continue reading I don’t always know how to behave – that’s what a personality disorder is, but I promise I’m trying!