anxiety, Borderline Personality Disorder, Depression, illness, mental health, mind, Personality Disorder, poetry, published, Uncategorized, writer

Just thinking

Thinking thoughts of terror Usually underlying insecurities Constantly changing choices Harmful hasty hazards Watching, waiting, worrying Feeling forever judged Fearing, forgetting frequently Lost, lonely, laid awake She slips silently away, straining Eternal exhaustion eats away Broken bluntly at the bottom Potentially poisonous plans Recurring reactions & responses Daunting dangers of the day ahead Impressions of… Continue reading Just thinking

anxiety, blogging, Borderline Personality Disorder, Depression, illness, mental health, mind, parenting, Personality Disorder, Uncategorized

Becoming a chameleon

This piece of paper was what I was given as I left the psychiatrists appointment room that day in January this year, feeling deflated, suicidal, defeated, crushed & unable to pick myself up. I felt my life was over. When I finally went back to my GP 3 years ago I knew my mental health… Continue reading Becoming a chameleon

anxiety, Bereavement, blogging, Borderline Personality Disorder, Depression, illness, mental health, mind, parenting, Personality Disorder, published, Uncategorized, writer

Learning that my “Triggers” aren’t what I thought they were

This is my 6 years ago, fun loving & free. I'm aiming to get back on a swing this year! Having had anxiety for a while, alongside the borderline personality disorder, I had made assumptions as to what my triggers must be. Things I thought were triggers: Large crowds New people New places Social media… Continue reading Learning that my “Triggers” aren’t what I thought they were

anxiety, Bereavement, blogging, Borderline Personality Disorder, Depression, illness, mental health, mind, parenting, Personality Disorder, published, self harm, Uncategorized, writer

Fortunate me!

Today I count my blessings. I know it's been very negative from me lately, & I apologise for that, I'm still not out the other side but getting there. I'm feeling fortunate for so many things My daughters My husband My sisters These really do hold me together when the glue starts to crack! My… Continue reading Fortunate me!

anxiety, blogging, Borderline Personality Disorder, Depression, illness, mental health, mind, Personality Disorder, published, self harm, Uncategorized, writer

From my toes to my nose – the highs and lows of BPD

The scariest thing about Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), is how quickly it can change, in days, hours or even minutes. I can and do spot trends. After a build up of extreme highs, comes the lows. Often the higher the high, the lower the low and I'm told regularly that until I receive the tools… Continue reading From my toes to my nose – the highs and lows of BPD