Borderline Personality Disorder

Florida, Orlando get ready cos here we come! Holiday prep – screw you anxiety!

So we’re almost here & for a holiday of a lifetime the pressure was bound to build up. But over the last week I’ve been trying to combine a number of things:

  • Getting work in order to avoid worrying while I’m away
  • Coping mechanisms & plans for my stay
  • Self care / pamper

So firstly, for the first time in over a year I went to a salon & had my nails done. I didn’t have someone come to my house. It was a small step as the lady has nail bar in her garage. So not technically a salon, but I left the house. And I’ve gone for the full Disney look:

Following that I went to the hair salon. This was a big deal. I have been before, but I hate it, & often my hairdresser finds time in her life to fit me in at home. She is amazing! However yet again I wanted to push myself. I attended at 9am so it was quieter. My biggest anxiety in salons mainly involve the staring at the mirror in front of you for several hours, whilst generally readying trashy gossip magazines full of photoshopped, skinny attractive women, then you glance in the mirror & the judgements you make on yourself are never kind. So I made a plan… I took my book.

  • Distraction
  • Not looking in the mirror
  • Not looking at the impossible body images often shown

Me in a hair salon, a full salon, probably 20 people at least in there. It was in a shopping centre too so this was a huge deal for me. But I did it & went purple once again

Tomorrow I’m booked to have my false eyes lashes for my holiday too.

My coping mechanisms are simple at the moment

  • My husband has taken control of my medication & dispenses it on a timely basis
  • The kids & hubby are going to go down for breakfast 10 minutes before me each morning just to give me that breathing space
  • We are planning to go to theme parks every day, so on the days, of which I’m sure there will be, that I’m overly anxious, we will choose to go to one of the 5 water parks we have tickets for. I can lounge on a sun lounger with a book & no-one else will miss out. Hopefully this will be less anxious than a theme park, but the girls will love the water rides & I might even have a trip round the lazy river.

I’m aware that busy places, lots of people & noise cause my anxiety to increase. But I know that! Being aware of your triggers helps so much. I have made plans such as always holding one of the kids hands is in place. I’ve got an app which marks out the coffee shops, so if I just need to go sit down I can. And I’m also going to try not to be too hard on myself.

Everything won’t be perfect, it won’t, but it will still be an incredible holiday & I can do it. I can make sure my kids have an amazing time! I’ll make them proud & I think I might even enjoy it too!

Florida, Orlando get ready cos here we come!

2 thoughts on “Florida, Orlando get ready cos here we come! Holiday prep – screw you anxiety!”

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